burden

I.CAN’T.DO.THIS.

Because sometimes He speaks so clearly I stop in my tracks…

If following God means the joy I’m showing, would our kids want to be in His will?

I tell them:
-The best place to be is in God’s will.
-God loves you and has a plan for your life.
-Serving God is the greatest thing you could ever do.

Then I mope around the house. I’m short with them. I rush through bedtime to get a break.

Sometimes I probably look downright miserable doing what I tell them He’s called me to do.

Why would they ever want to follow Him with me making it look so terrible?

I’m the first to say that the life of a Christian is not one of ease. Christ suffered. Why would we expect any less? But I also believe a life without joy is not living the life Christ died to give us.

I’m also the first to admit that having kids is hard. And we don’t own it enough. And everyone looks perfect, so we keep smiling while we’re dying inside and just so, so tired.

But has He called me here? In this little spot we call home? Has He called me to be His ambassador? To partner with Him in shaping these little arrows to be sent out?

YES!

The disconnect…Working in my own strength. Carrying the burden He intends to bear. Talking God to our kids while not talking to God myself.

I.CAN’T.DO.THIS.

That’s where I find freedom. I can’t, but He can. He never asked me to do the things I’m trying to do. That’s why I get burned out.

So I give them to Him all over again. And I can smile and laugh and run and tickle. And yes, I’m still so tired, but it’s a joyful tired.

Because being in His will…where else is there to be?

  “Have you not known? Have you not heardThe LORD is the everlasting Godthe Creator of the ends of the earthHe does not faint or grow wearyhis understanding is unsearchableHe gives power to the faintand to him who has no might he increases strengthEven youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhaustedbut they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eaglesthey shall run and not be wearythey shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:28-31)

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And currently we have two two year olds!

 

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Am I the only one discontent?

It hit me hard the other day. Holy Spirit like smack you in the face. Discontent. I’m living life discontent.

I was reading Jeremiah 20. He goes from “Sing to the Lord” to “Cursed be the day on which I was born!” I can be moody like that. Joy can quickly move to despair.

A holy Google search of Jeremiah 20 brought me to this from Matthew Henry…

“How foolish and unnatural are the thoughts and wishes of our hearts, when we yield to discontent! Let us consider Him who endured the contradiction of sinners against himself, lest we should be at any time weary and faint in our minds under our lesser trials.”

Yes!

And then Brad recently said this, “What did I once see as an honor that I now see as a burden?”

Yes again!

Y’all,  kids that fuss and a house that gets dirty and food that has to be cooked and beds that have to be made…all blessings, all honor, all privileges.

But discontentment can leave me calling them burdens. It can leave me looking at your Facebook and wishing my life was ” that good.”

I forget Him. Who endured such pain…for me. And who in the world am I to gripe? And who am I to gripe over His blessings?

Life is hard. And the monotony can drain. But God forbid I ever forget how blessed I am. How anything better than Hell is grace. In Him I have all I could ever need and so, so much more!

“For ‘In him we live and move and have our being,’ as even some of your own poets have said, ‘For we are indeed his offspring’.” (Acts 17:28)

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