The way he looks at me when I walk in the room. I know he’s been waiting. Watching the door through his crib slats.
I remember watching the door in ICU. I can feel myself lying in that bed waiting for visiting hours. Longing to see my family.
God was taking me back to childhood. Making Himself the most important thing. Stripping away the rest.
He tries to do that now. Longs for me to look intently at Him. Waiting. Knowing only He can satisfy.
But there are messes to clean. Bills to pay. Diapers to change. Meals to cook.
To be back there but not to be back there. Longing for Him. Knowing He is the only One who can satisfy. Truly believing the cross and His love are enough.
Because when we are desperate only He makes sense. He is our Rescuer. Our Redeemer. Our Savior. Always close.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” (Hebrews 12:1,1)